the best way to ruin egg salad...

is by putting it on burnt toast because you only have ten minutes to get to work and you cant re-toast the bread or you'll be late and if youre late one more time you'll get fired so you then wait ten minutes to drive to work and clock in and by that time the toast is not only burnt but now cold and rock hard so you cut the roof of your mouth when taking your first bite (that youre secretly hoping will still be delicious) but by that time everyone has already seen that you brought a sandwich to work and they keep telling you how good it looks so you want to keep eating it to convince them that youre a good cook when really...really youre just stuck eating a really bad sandwich and you can only handle two more bites before it just becomes too painful and too sad to bear so you throw it away and try to forget the whole ordeal.